Fantastic voyage
Today we took advantage of a free "beach nature walk" tour offered by the Disney resort. It's honestly been one of the favorite parts of my vacation. We had a great guide, and it was only us and four other people (two parents and their two kids) so it was very interactive.

I can also honestly say it's the only time in any tour I've taken where the guide has uttered the phrase, "If I'm going to pay that much for drinks at a titty bar [in Tampa], it had better not be a cock tease." (The family with kids were long gone to their resort room by this point, for the record, so he was safe in saying it.) I'm still giggling about that one -- the "other" side of Disney. Needless to say, we had a lot of fun! Click here for photos. Tomorrow is another travel day by the way, so I'll see ya' when I see ya'!
posted at 06:02 PM | link-

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G'day, and welcome to day four
A day full of sun, sand and yummy-nummy banana daiquiris by the pool! Again, sorry for the small size, but they'll have to do for now while we're on dial-up...
posted at 06:00 PM | link-

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Who 'dat?

Warren [Sapp] was interviewed at a Orlando Magic game. The reporter asked him, "What do you think of your knew quarterback Chris Simms?" His answer was: "Who? Who is that?" [pay-link from Todd]

Now that sounds more like my Tampa Bay Buccaneers!
posted at 07:23 PM | link-

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Oh, Carolina!
We've finally arrived at our main destination -- Disney's Hilton Head Island Resort. Thanks to an amazing FL resident special, we were able to reserve a 2-bedroom villa for several dollars a night cheaper than the published rates on the studios. Needless to say, it's absolutely amazing here -- but I don't expect anything less of Disney.

We're both exhausted, so we're taking the rest of today as a lazy day off. Todd's catching the tail-end of the NFL Draft, and I just put more photos online. We couldn't resist heading to the Savannah Historic District one last time early this morning. We took Claire for walks through the parks and shot more of the beautiful scenery. Again, they're all small 'til we get home since we're still on dialup -- but I have two new galleries with about 1/4 of the pics taken:

1. Savannah Historic District - 04.27.03
2. Hilton Head Island - 04.27.03

I'll try to actually write a few summaries later, but after "Mr. Irrelevant" is selected, it's nappy time! Hope everyone had a great weekend -- I've really enjoyed reading all your comments! -Robyn
posted at 05:10 PM | link-

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[slow mo] Noooooooooooo [/slow mo]
Todd made me login to publicly state that we will never, EVER consider him a Buccaneer -- much less cheer for him. What was Chucky thinking? Ugh. Expect the two of us to be bringing some very interesting signs to training camp this summer...
posted at 08:56 PM | link-

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Southern living
We're just getting back in from a fun-filled day in the Savannah Historic District. We took a trolley tour with Old Town Trolley Tours, which was a great way to see the city. There were fourteen stops, and you could exit to walk around and rejoin with the next trolley any time you wanted. Due to being on dial-up, I'm only uploading 10 small shots right now. Enjoy!

Tomorrow we're back on the road again...so until then...don't do anything I wouldn't do. That should give you all lots of leeway. Thanks for the well-wishes and all the sweet notes left yesterday and today! -Robyn (P.S. Hover mouse over images for browser bar descriptions.)

UPDATE: We didn't spy any stars, but we did see them filming this movie by the river today.

UPDATE 2: You can now find these, and more, Savannah images full-size here.
posted at 07:17 PM | link-

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It's a long way down Holiday Road
[trip day 1]

Just an old, sweet song keeps Georgia on my mind... Greetings from Savannah! Miss me yet? We're enjoying our first vacation since '99. We got in too late to shoot much, but here are a few snaps from the road...

Happy weekend!
-R&T&C
posted at 12:31 AM | link-

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She's the sheriff

While I'm not moseyin' around these-there parts, Statia is going to be the new sheriff in town. This means she'll be monitoring my comments and such and making sure this here's a friendly environment. Tip your hats accordingly and y'all be nice to her, ya' hear?
posted at 12:02 AM | link-

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If you want my body and you think I'm sexy...
To the person that came up with the idea of a tinted self-tanner that will show you potential streaks before the product "sets", I keeees you! I look tropical islicious right now...
posted at 09:11 PM | link-

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Don't label me please

When you ping weblogs.com, you give these details for the world to use. That's your opt-in. That data is free game for anybody to play with. BlogShares provides an opt-out mechanism because I want to be nice not because I have to. Weblogs.com isn't for any particular purpose, you opt in to it you opt into everything associated with it. [link]

For the record: I didn't ask for my site to be pulled because I thought it was cool. Or trendy. Or because I wanted to jump on a bandwagon.

I did it because I have issue to the above sentiment that BlogShares is based on. When I ping weblogs.com, I expect that ping to be used for the purpose it was intended -- blog updating tools (like Blogrolling) to notify others when I have updated. Not so that other sites I no longer approve of can use my site and my name. Hence my removal request. I didn't yank my site because I was sitting around bored without anything better to do. I yanked it because -- from the top on down -- I saw behavior I didn't want my site associated with. Period. I didn't "opt in" to Blogshares, no matter how long Seyed wants to sit down and try to explain it me. I did, however, opt out. That is my right.
posted at 07:48 PM | link-

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No, not just for some but for everyone...
I'm filing both of these away for future reference regarding the "bloggers helping bloggers fund" portion of this year's Boobie-Thon proceeds (please don't vote now -- that will come later in September):

helpkat.com: "I am asking for help while I get the necessary treatments and possible surgery for my back. I have scoliosis and it has taken a turn (no pun intended) for the worse."
chuckpierce.com/ring/: "I am a single father who wants to give the best woman in the world a Diamond and marry her."

If you know of any others, please pass them along so I can add them to the file... The cause selected will receive $359.00 (assuming that amount is raised, of course). -Robyn
posted at 05:41 PM | link-

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Whatevah! You ain't bad. You ain't nuthin'!
Whoa. I had no idea all the Blogshares hubbub was going on until I read about it over at Solonor's just now. You can read more at Kat's and at Zu's. Apparently you aren't "allowed" to opt out of the game without risking ridicule, flaming, and enough trolls to cause you to shut your blog down. Excuse me, but my definition of a game is something you CHOOSE to play -- or not -- it isn't something you're forced into because someone wants fame, popularity, and a suitcase full of cyber Monopoly money.

"Your weblog is not you." Well I beg to differ. And as such, consider the Blogshares button and updates gone from my sidebar.

Most of you already know that in times of crisis, I always turn to the great orator Eric Theodore Cartman. And to quote him, "Whatevah. I do what I want!"

UPDATE: I just found the directions if you want to unlist your blog (and your profile) here. I accidentally e-mailed my first request. Oops.
posted at 04:41 PM | link-

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Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Riddle me this... Would it really hurt Nabisco's pocket books to throw a shot of Captain Morgain's in their butter rum Lifesavers? Y'know, just for good measure and all.
posted at 04:21 PM | link-

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I'll shoot your eye out, kid
Oh how I wanna bean this muthafucka in the head with a baseball now myself! I'm thinkin' this pitch to the noggin, minus the hard-hat. Who's in?
posted at 03:37 PM | link-

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23 positions in a one-night stand
Is it really worth wasting your time to launch an all-out boycott of FOX and all of the merchants that sponsor "Mr. Personality"? I realize Monica Lewinsky will probably go down (ok, bad choice of words there) as one of the most controversial women of the late 20th century. But it wasn't like she wanted her Oval Office, errrr, meetings made public initially. And god forbid we all be held accountable for the questionable blowjobs* we gave in our early 20s. I'd dare say 3/4 of the women in this country would be boycotted if that were the case.

Yeah, she's milked (oops, bad choice of words there as well) that 15 minutes of fame for all it's worth since her little blue dress got Tripped up. Like that's considered shocking in this day and age. And since when is it anything new in this country to parade around women embroiled in sexual controversy for the almighty dollar? No Excuses jeans campaigns, anyone? I just wish people would devote all of that time and energy to real causes that will change the planet. Not yesterday's news... UPDATE: *See clarification for Dave here.
posted at 12:40 PM | link-

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Every time I scratch my nails down someone else's back...
I'm getting seriously Googled lately for my old "break-up songs" entry from last May -- so if you need any, or just want to add a few to the list yourself, head to the comments.

UPDATE: For a limited time only, here's my contribution.

Click here for song lyrics
posted at 10:49 AM | link-

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Putting the hump in "hump day"
So I actually, like, had a life today and all. Whaddya gonna do?
posted at 10:56 PM | link-

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Will work for bandwidth
The Movable Type team has expanded Six Apart into TypePad -- "an upcoming hosted service providing powerful tools for creating full-featured weblogs". You can signup at the site to receive more information. Someday we can all say we knew them when... Seems just like yesterday I was reading about Movable Type, pre-release, at Dawn's! Greymatter feels like another lifetime ago, and I've never looked back. Good luck everyone!
posted at 01:31 PM | link-

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Isn't she ~~lovely~~ ugly?
Since I've now received this link at least 10 times in the last week (sheesh, you people think you know me or what? thanks!) -- I guess it's time to blog it here! Visit Ugly Dress.com for proof that 99% of the time they can't (and won't) "wear it again".
posted at 01:09 PM | link-

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In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make

When the [Blogshares] site goes live all shares in your portfolio will be deleted as will your transaction history for the beta period. You will only take your cash balance forward. Blogs will have their shares reset to the original 5000 and you will receive 1000 shares in every blog you've claimed ownership of. So be sure to sell your stock early. [link]

Just in case you've missed the above e-mail and / or announcement on the Blogshares website, everything in your portfolio will be deleted on May 1st. You only carry your cash balance and 1000 shares of any blog you've claimed into the non-beta site. So what does this mean? Sell, sell, sell! I've you've gifted me shares (and thank you for doing so!) please don't get your feelings hurt if you see that I've sold them. They won't stay in my account after 5/1 no matter what. Let Black Wednesday begin...
posted at 09:38 PM | link-

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Hey baby, I'm forever your girl
Running across this a few weeks late obviously, but you knew someone had to do it eventually... The American Idol Drinking Game, dawg.

UPDATE: Who in the hell is the songwriter-judge this week? Her music sucks serious ass.
posted at 08:06 PM | link-

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Solace through nature, Chapter XVII

With a hand to your head
You sigh out loud
As a memory washes over
And buries you.....

For everyone
There's a person place or time
That brings you back
And makes you feel alive
Before your reason clouds your eyes
You could rule the world if you wanted to

—"Cry in the Sun", Better Than Ezra

posted at 07:07 PM | link-

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Goodbye, Norma Jean
FARK linked a lovely, rare Marilyn Monroe / Norma Jean bathing suit and nude gallery today. The photos are all large in size and great quality -- very nice!
posted at 04:26 PM | link-

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Tuesday, shoot me in the head - I'm takin' it back
Haven't done a "news not fit to print" wrap-up in awhile...so here goes:

Looking at his academic photo, this guy just screams "child molester". I mean, c'mon.
Gwen Stefani is going solo and wants to take up acting. Apparently she missed last year's Swept Away and Crossroads. (Thankfully, so did I.)
Do they make a Hallmark for "Gee, I'm sorry I shot the groom on your wedding day"?
SARS in a can -- now there's a concept that works! Soon with the slogan, "The refreshing drink that will take your breath away..."
Best. Homemade Porno. Ever. (PG-rated, from Sensible Erection.)

And now...your moment of zen...
posted at 04:00 PM | link-

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Curses - foiled again!
So I see OU didn't really beat the 'whorns the last three years running...interesting!
posted at 11:49 PM | link-

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If they don't give me proper credit, I just walk away
"This is what the fuck I think I'm doing..." <snicker>
posted at 10:40 PM | link-

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Every other day of the week is fine, yeah
This should almost be like a "don't ask, don't tell" blog entry I think. We watched "Maid in Manhattan" from Netflix tonight. It was so, so very bad. One of those 90 minutes of my life...gone...kinda deals.

So then Todd flipped over to regular TV and we caught the very tail end of Mr. Personality. We didn't even watch but five minutes, and we're both already creeped out. The whole masks and blindfolding thing -- it's just way too strange for me. And another thing... The most overused phrase on reality TV is now "on this journey". Everything is a journey. No it's not. It's a "let's see how long I can milk this thing 'til Playboy comes-a calling" experience. That's it. You want a journey? Book a safari to Africa, darlin'. It's pretty sad when the thing that's the least odd about your show is the fact Monica Lewinsky is the host.
posted at 10:07 PM | link-

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Is it any wonder I'm sane at all
Yeah, I'm a closet Styx fan, too. Wanna make somethin of it?

Lyrics: Too Much Time On My Hands, by Styx

Sitting on this barstool talking like a damn fool
Got the twelve o'clock news blues
And I've given up hope on the afternoon soaps
And a bottle of cold brew
Is it any wonder I'm not crazy?
Is it any wonder I'm sane at all?

Well I'm so tired of losing
I got nothing to do and all day to do it

I go out cruisin' but I've no place to go
And all night to get there

Is it any wonder I'm not a criminal?
Is it any wonder I'm not in jail?
Is it any wonder I've got.....

Too much time on my hands
It's ticking away with my sanity
I've got too much time on my hands
It's hard to believe such a calamity
I've got too much time on my hands
And it's ticking away from me

Too much time on my hands
Too much time on my hands
Too much time on my hands

Well, I'm a jet fuel genius
I solve all the world's problems
Without even trying

I have dozens of friends
And the fun never ends
That is, as long as I'm buying

Is it any wonder I'm not the President?
Is it any wonder I'm null and void?
Is it any wonder I've got.....

Too much time on my hands
It's ticking away at my sanity
I've got too much time on my hands
It's hard to believe such a calamity
I've got too much time on my hands
And it's ticking away from me

Too much time on my hands
Too much time on my hands
Too much time on my hands.....
posted at 01:39 PM | link-

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Watch out boy, she'll chew you up

"The truth is, Marriott offered nothing in the way of intellectual stimulation, or entertainment, except for the occasional laugh at his own expense." —The Maneater, University of Missouri student newspaper

Gee, there's a review you didn't see coming. I realize it is Mizzou and all, but just exactly who did they think they were booking? At least OU invited the likes of Jimmy Fallon and Ben Stein. I mean, did they even watch the show? Marriott made a foot-fetish and bondage film actress look classy in comparison. When asked his opinion of the University of Missouri, Marriott replied, "It’s really cool because it is a college campus. There’s dorms. It has a very college campus feel." Wisdom for the ages, man... (Read more at MSNBC.com's "The Scoop".)
posted at 12:59 PM | link-

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Super Sonic!

Attention Tampa Bay residents: A new Sonic Drive-In opens up in Oldsmar on Monday, April 21st, at 7 a.m. It's on Tampa Rd., just up the road from the AMC 20 movie theater -- across the street from Wal Mart, and next to a new Chick-fil-A. Be there or be

.
posted at 01:47 AM | link-

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You won't have Dick to kick around anymore
Yeah, yeah. He goes through phases. I have no control over them, or him. What can I say...

So don't yell at me over his decision, capiche? I just keep 'im around for the fine bootay and clean close shave.
posted at 12:04 AM | link-

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Let's get physical
Have you ever noticed that in any exercise equipment or weight loss product commercial in the "before" shots the people are flabby and pasty white -- but in the "after" shots, suddenly not only are they thin and toned, but they're also sporting a new deep-dark tan just weeks later. Where did the tan come from? Does the product really do both? Because if so, I really might consider the purchase being my skin is translucent and all...
posted at 01:18 PM | link-

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Happy Sunday
It's really hard for me to wish everyone a Happy Easter today. Sure I could go against everything I was raised with and put up pics of Peeps, Easter eggs, and little chocolate bunnies -- but those aren't really the reasons I've always celebrated the holiday.

I've spent a great portion of my year mad at God. I'm trying to make peace with him, but I'm just not there yet. And today only symbolizes the start of the Hallmark season of family holidays -- Mother's Day and Father's Day are right around the corner. So while I should be happily in my second trimester by now, instead I'm left rapidly changing the channel every time another Luvs and Huggies commercial comes on.

So please forgive me if I don't put up generic "Happy Easter" greetings. This year, it just isn't for me... -Robyn
posted at 12:50 PM | link-

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Greeeeeeeat! 500 it is!
An updated version of the MT BlogShares Plugin has been released to fix the stock price issues from earlier today. However, this updated version doesn't include the available shares hack yet. So if any code monkeys out there wanna give it a whirl, I'll bat my eyelashes accordingly. Thanks to David for jumping in with lightning-speed to fix the problem!

UPDATE: The above has been added to the MT Plugin. Thanks again David!
posted at 12:56 AM | link-

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Penny arcade
He plays the role of gaming god oh so well, but after watching me play the one and only game I enjoy -- Centipede, old school Atari style -- with that all-knowing snicker that he could do better, I invited him to put his mouse where his mouth is. I'd like to point that that I own every single high score. Still. He didn't even break the 12K barrier and get a new life. Mmmm...hmmmm. Girl power.
posted at 10:47 PM | link-

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April 19th
I can't believe it's been eight years. I also can't believe it took me 'til 6:30 p.m. to remember today was the anniversary. Promoguy has a lovely set of images from the Memorial. Go see them if you haven't already.
posted at 06:16 PM | link-

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Nice day for a white wedding
I was just out back taking photos of lizards, and Todd came running out yelling, "You've gotta see this!" Turns out, our next door neighbor's daughter is getting married today and we got outside just as the limo was arriving. I've never met her, but the bride looked beautiful. Wanna see? (Her, and the lizards of course...)

posted at 03:06 PM | link-

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Gremlins?
Has anyone using the Blogshares plugin noticed that it's showing their stock price as $0, yet that's not actually the price?

UPDATE: I got a quick e-mail from the author of the MT-plugin in question, after I left him a comment. This is what it said:

Thanks for the heads up. I've been knee deep in work and school for a couple days, so I was unaware of the problem. It seems the pages at blogshares.com changed just enough to break the plugin. I'll try and get a new version out tonight, along with support for the portfolio RSS feeds.

I'll post more info when I have it! (UPDATE: See here.)
posted at 02:03 PM | link-

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She wore an itsy bitsy teenie weenie yellow polka dot bikini
I have just found my new favorite fashion company -- and of all things, they make swimwear! Check out the beautiful model front and center on their main page (and also in their print ads). She has an unairbrushed tummy roll. And moving along to page two, you'll find even more real women with real bodies in bikinis. The whole site is like this. With swimsuit season almost upon us, I know who I want to receive my $$ the next time I purchase one! Hurrah!

UPDATE: Oh how cute -- check out their honeymoon swimwear line!
posted at 12:25 AM | link-

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May justice be swift and severe
Sometimes I really hate it when I'm right...
posted at 10:46 PM | link-

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I'm a no-good, filthy dirty whore
Just so we've got that straight... If you're going to spam my comments with the same IP but different names, at least be a little more original. Really. That one is tired. It's run its course. And just in case you're stuck, here's a thesaurus.

I've mentioned this to those close to me -- but since I've gotten so many "when's the Boobie-Thon II" queries this week -- I'll just put it all right out here in the open this very moment. In answer to the main question, this October, to coincide with Breast Cancer Awareness month.

But let me sidebar for a moment... The only way. And I repeat the only way I will host and coordinate this as an annual event is if it retains the original spirit of the first Boobie-Thon. What's that mean? Not only is it bloggers for charity, it's also going to be bloggers helping their own. We're a community, and part of being in a community is looking out for one another and supporting each other when times get tough. So $359.00 of the money raised this year (the price of Statia's plane ticket last year) will be going to a blogger "charity". What "charity" you might ask? Well when the time comes I'll try to gather as many different bloggers as I can from different walks of life and form a panel. The panel will take submissions from various bloggers pointing out causes needing funds. This could be anything from charity events, medical expenses, natural disaster expenses, you name it...we'll accept applications for it... I don't even have to know the people and projects being submitted. It just has to be something from the blogging community. Because I'm not licensed or funded we obviously won't be able to launch full-scale fraud investigations -- so we'll be relying on that thing called trust, gut instinct, and the old-fashioned honor system. As the time draws nearer, I'll be relying on everyone's advice and help to work the kinks out. Every other penny raised beyond the first $359 will go to Susan G. Komen. Last year we sent the Foundation $1251.00.

Let me make it clear that I flat-out refuse to donate my time and effort unless the spirit of the original "contest" lives on. I have taken flak from here to Oklahoma and back on raising money for friends. Well I'm sorry, but when my friends are in need -- that's what I do. And I'll continue to do it again this year. That is, if you're all in... See you in October!

-Robyn
posted at 09:56 PM | link-

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Have you seen my baseball?
Do you ever get the feeling as you're going through life that God was a huge fan of There's Something about Mary...and he's just sitting upstairs snickering, "I'm fucking with you, Ted!"
posted at 01:58 PM | link-

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In the eye of the beholder
The more I sit here and think about it, the more thankful I am that most of the world's priceless artwork was completed (and in many cases, commissioned by the Church itself) before today's so-called "Judeo-Christian" standard / ethic came into place. What a truly boring, bland world full of "safe" Thomas Kinkade paintings it would be...

[what is art]

posted at 09:21 PM | link-

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Chocolatey and delightful

Now, before we go saying "it doesn't bother me, it was her business, yadda yadda yadda" lets take a step back and realize what these magazines are truely for. Call it art, call it whatever, but all they are are masturbation rags.....The "you can do anything you want and don't worry about what anyone else thinks of you, cause it doesn't matter" attitude may sound good and fine, but it really does matter what people think of you. Don't beleive me - then go down to the county courthouse in your areas and strip naked and smear chocolate syrup all over your bodies. See how fast you go to jail, make the news and never get another job other than bagging groceries at the local supermarket. [link]

A-ha! The comment I was waiting for... I knew one would show up eventually. I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but in the grand scheme of things, it really doesn't matter what people think of me. Shocking, I know.

The only human being that gets the right for me to pay mind to things like that has their wedding band on my left-ring finger. Anyone out there care to retort?
posted at 06:07 PM | link-

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Can't nobody hold me down - oh no

Hold on to your wallets: The ever-entrepreneurial Sean "P-Diddy" Combs is ready to expand once again. In addition to being firmly planted in the world of Hip-Hop, Puff has also fancied himself a fashion designer, restaurateur and now video game guru. According to the New York Post, P Diddy's planning to create a video game based on - who else - himself that allow players to "create an entertainment conglomerate" by signing musical acts, spending mega bucks on marketing campaigns and acquiring assets. [link]

Oh. Goodie. I'd like to reserve my copy now, please.
posted at 05:09 PM | link-

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I want candy
[hard candy]

Hard candy. So are you a sucker, or a biter? I'm a biter.
posted at 03:15 PM | link-

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Wood good

Chey missed her calling at the Lumber Yard a year too late, or three months too early, it seems... "At the nudie bar!" (Full article at Yahoo! News. Link swiped from FARK headlines.)
posted at 12:41 PM | link-

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Double standard?
This has the potential to get really heated -- and I know that in advance. So I'm just making it real clear from the start that I reserve the right to edit, delete and/or ban your ass if you get out of line. I expect -- and demand -- respect in your answers. I have a low idiot tolerance right now and have no problem in putting my foot on your hind end as I shove you out the door. That said...

Reading a couple of blog entries (and comments) got me thinking more about "the penis blog project" (link not work safe).

When we did the boobie-thon last year, we were called whores, tramps, sluts, "Tampa trash", bad wives, unfit mothers, and just about every other derogatory term known to (wo)man. We even had entire blogs devoted to how immoral we were.

Is it different for the guys because they're guys? Is it different for the guys because most of them are gay*? (And I say that because most of my gay friends in college were much more open about -- and comfortable with -- their sexuality.) Do you really think the men who decided to bare it all will face any semblance of the scrutiny the girls that participated in the boobie-thon faced? Do you think there will eventually be a backlash? Or is this different because money isn't being raised (and as some would say, money to fly a friend out for a drunkfest -- even though the cost of the ticket was actually covered by friends -- and then we kept going and went on to raise over $1250 for charity)?

All respectful opinions welcome...

*I, too, would like to see straight male bloggers participate and remove any potential for stereotyping. Any other male bloggers out there considering it?
posted at 03:10 AM | link-

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You are getting very sleepy...
I hate it when you're so exhausted you could collapse on the spot, so you go to bed several hours early. And you sleep great. For two and ½ hours. And then bam! Eyes wide open, yet still tired as hell. Thank god I don't have to go to class in the morning or anything.
posted at 02:23 AM | link-

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That's the way, un huh un huh, I like it
Y'know, I am so sick and tired -- as a designer -- of petty little shits expecting each and every site to look their way. Or else. Just because you like to read the web at a 1600x1200 resolution with four tiled browser windows open at once, does not mean the rest of the web lives in your little world. In fact, you know what -- less than 3% of my site viewers are at that resolution. I personally think Times New Roman at 14-pt looks like ass. For crimeny's sake people, CNN uses Arial! Stacy did a fabulous job with The Command Post. In my opinion, this design just kicked it up another notch and took it from "great resource" to "professional resource". Maybe I've just spent one too many weeks designing for warbloggers -- and yes, they pay the bills -- and no, I probably shouldn't be saying this in a place they can find it. But I'm freakin' tired of "change it to my way or no way" from every person that comments on the design once it goes live. EACH of them has their own special little list -- and each of them expects it to be met or they're turning tail and leaving. So guess what. Go. Don't let the door hit you on the way out, you whiny little brats. Pick up your expensive play toys and keep on surfin'.

The following was sent to a critic of a design I did over the weekend. I think it's worth passing along...

Any design that I do for a client (read: not myself) has to be optimized for 800x600 viewers. Has to be -- no exceptions. About 25% of web surfers still use that resolution. If you view <insert name here's> site at that resolution, there is absolutely no extra space on either side of the main column. And in the design I did -- it's really a "fixed pixel" kinda deal, so doing percentages to tie up the whole browser based on viewing size aren't an option either. It would throw off the rest of the design as the site scaled up and down accordingly. In most blogs that we design for Sekimori, we use a hard-fixed pixel design, because they are optimized for most browsers. It's virtually impossible to code for IE (5.5, 6.0 and Mac), Mozilla, Opera, Netscape, Safari...etc...and keep everyone happy. So if you can force a design to stay the same in most if not all of the above, you do so. And I did.

Just as you would complain about a design being too "narrow" for your tastes viewing at 1600 wide, <insert name here> would receive an onslaught of mail complaining about the opposite from the 800 viewers if it were any wider and they had to scroll. For instance, in my own stats -- I have 53.29% of my viewers in 1024x768, 25.62% of my viewers at 800x600, and only 2.48% (less than three percent) in 1600x1200. I'd rather have three people out of 100 complain, than twenty-five. And that said, my current default skin has a slight scroll on 800x600. I created a second, scaled-down version of that Mae West design for the 800 crowd. I made myself happy first, because I'm allowed to do so at my own site -- while creating another option to keep others from yelling at me as well.

But you can't make everyone happy. You just can't.

<steps down from soapbox>
posted at 10:22 PM | link-

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Parting is such sweet sorrow
Can you hear me whoopin' "YES!" from here? Although I think Carmen should have got the boot tonight, I'm not gonna complain. Buh-bye to you and your freaky bad extensions that are fake just like the rest of the package. I'm with Michele -- Skinemax here she comes!
posted at 08:59 PM | link-

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Ode to spring

[geek lover]

I still can't breathe / feel like crap, but at least I make this new tank look good!
posted at 06:03 PM | link-

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ATPTB 5K
A quick follow-up to this entry: dave takes the 5000th comment for 2003 with this comment last night! At least I'm not the only one who never shuts up...
posted at 12:36 PM | link-

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It's not the size of your blog...
Well it looks like the Blogger Boobie-Thon is finally getting a run for its money. Now we have "the penis blog project". (WARNING: Link so not very work safe!)

But don't expect to see my Dick over there any time soon. No. Seriously...
posted at 03:10 AM | link-

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If you think that I'm a loser, well you suck
When you lie, kiss your baby bye bye bye
And if you're true, the whole wide world will laugh with you
When we see nothing's wrong with you and me
Time will tell, it might even bring a wedding bell

If you think that I'm a loser
Well you suck, 'cause you know I ain't nothin' but a user
Of your love I can't get enough
Girl it's true, the whole wide world is smiling with you

Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up

Sometimes I know, and sometimes I'm on the go
But I'm comin' back, so don't give me no flack, yeah
It's all you, and it's me too
And it's your world, you's the girl, you's the girl

Happier than shit, things that might go click with me
Click with you, is that love? Is that love, ohhh...

Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up

Watch the little daisies grow, little daisies grow
Now just push th' little daisies and make 'em come up
Watch them grow, watch them grow

As I push the little daisies and make 'em come up
Make 'em come up, make 'em come up,
Make 'em come up, say

Push th' little daisies and make 'em come up......
posted at 02:46 AM | link-

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Splitsville
I decided to go a little crazy tonight and split my stock. There are currently 24 shares available at half the previous price as a result. Snap 'em up while you can!
posted at 12:00 AM | link-

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Iraq the casbah

A quick follow-up to this photo. Never let it be said that Sooners don't represent!
posted at 11:06 PM | link-

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It's a Cinderella story...
The new April 2003 "Fifteen Minutes of Fame" wedding feature is now up over at WM!

If you know anyone who was married recently, please beg them on my behalf to submit their wedding summary. (Or do it for them!)
posted at 09:03 PM | link-

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It's now ruined rock 'n' roll to me
For the love of God...can we just move beyond her tits, ass and fake hair color for like five seconds people, and finally admit...she has NO freakin' talent... At all. Please! I'm so sick of watching the judges gloss over her lousy performances in their summaries. Thank God Simon always attempts to at least somewhat put her in her place...
posted at 08:11 PM | link-

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Inquiring minds wanna know
I just realized we missed the season finale of NBC's "Ed" last Friday. Did anyone else out there catch it? I just want to know if it was another lame "will he choose Carol / will Carol choose him" kinda deal that you have to wait 'til next season for, or if they actually didn't leave you hanging for a change. Any summaries appreciated!

UPDATE: Forgot to mention... What in the hell is with all the season finales in April this year, anyway? First they push back the start of the season to mid-October on most shows. Now they try to wrap them up by mid-April. Do they think we also don't notice that most TV shows are 5-10% shorter with more commercials packed in as well? It wasn't always this way!
posted at 05:32 PM | link-

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