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Sun 'n' fun
Leave it to my husband's company to schedule mandatory training from 9-4 on our anniversary weekend. At least he gets paid for it...

When Todd gets home, it's hasta la bye-bye. Thanks to the wonders of Priceline.com we've snagged ourselves an overnight at the beach Hilton, at a rate so low we can't display it here. So behave yourselves. And don't do anything I wouldn't do*.

*We all know this gives you a great amount of leeway. Don't disappoint me.
posted at 03:48 PM | link--it | mail it | (5) shout it



We'll love until...the end of time
The quality on these is absolutely horrendous, because they weren't made with professional video equipment. Rather, I was just testing out my new tripod -- so I aimed it at the TV and shot captures of our wedding video. Yeah, I'm a sap like that. So forgive the scroll and bad colors...you should get the idea anyway...

I won't leave these up for long -- but for now, enjoy!
  1. "the kiss" (retired)
  2. the toast (retired)
  3. the get-away (retired)
  4. the carriage ride (retired)
  5. "best couple in the world" (retired)
It seems like only yesterday...
posted at 08:59 AM | link--it | mail it | (12) shout it






I ain't sayin' a word. Not one single word.
*cough* Sidebar. Blogroll. *cough*
posted at 11:46 PM | link--it | mail it | (17) shout it



Oh what a tangled (world wide) web we weave
I promise we'll only sue you if don't link, participate and/or donate to this year's boobie-thon... I knew something didn't sit right with me concerning that whole deal. Now I know why. Thanks to Todd for the heads-up follow-up!
posted at 03:53 PM | link--it | mail it | (1) shout it



The seven year itch
I won't be around much this weekend because Sunday is our seventh wedding anniversary -- so I'm putting this up now.

Seven years ago today I was on my way to New Orleans to marry my best friend. We met when I was still in my teens, and now we're both thirty. But that doesn't stop us from having water-bottle fights on the couch, belching contests, and quoting Cartman and Beavis as if they spoke the Gospel.

Our marriage hasn't always been easy. But it has always been more than I could have possibly asked for out of life -- the good always overshadowing the bad. If I knew my heart would have been capable of this much love on our wedding day, seven years later, it would have completely overwhelmed me. It still does, really. I can take just about anything life throws at me because he is by my side.

He's still the one.

Seven down. Here's to seventy more... I love you, baby!
Happy anniversary!
-Robyn






UPDATE: Here's last year's blog-card just because...
posted at 03:10 PM | link--it | mail it | (37) shout it



You're about as easy as a nuclear war
An update to the post below...
  1. First U.S. show in Costa Mesa, CA
  2. Official site with more tour, and presale ticket, information
  3. John Taylor's official site (thanks Elfchick!)
All I have to say is they'd better be adding a Florida date or two to the list soon!
posted at 01:26 PM | link--it | mail it | (3) shout it



I said it again, but could I please rephrase it
Ok, I need a moment here... Duran Duran is back together and will be touring the U.S. soon. ALL of Duran Duran. Not those bastardized versions from the early 90s. I'm talkin' Simon LeBon, Nick Rhodes, John Taylor, Roger Taylor and Andy Taylor together on the very same stage.

To this day I'm traumatized that when I was 11, my best friend's mom got a huge block of tickets to a show for her birthday -- and my mom wouldn't let me go because she said I was too young to attend a concert, even with parental supervision. To make matters worse, one of the girls in the group caught Roger Taylor's towel. Granted, my crush was on Nick and Simon -- but still!

I'll be back later. I have some vinyl to dust off...
posted at 12:54 PM | link--it | mail it | (20) shout it



But I'll wait my dear 'til it's my turn
And now I issue a dare. A challenge, if you will. Get a song stuck in everyone's head this Friday. Go on. Just try it. Here's my contribution -- put yours in the comments:


It's not the things you do that tease and hurt me bad
But it's the way you do the things you do to me
I'm not the kind of girl who gives up just like that
Oh, no...

The tide is high but I'm holding on
I'm gonna be your number one
Number one, number one...



Get to it...
posted at 12:01 AM | link--it | mail it | (51) shout it






You've gotta fight...for your right...to...photograph?
Spied over at Jason's..."The Photographer's Right - A Downloadable Flier".

Considering Starbucks doesn't even want you to take photos inside now, might not be such a bad thing to keep handy.
posted at 09:26 PM | link--it | mail it | (6) shout it



I think a change'll do you good
Jen had a great entry about a song that prompted a major life change. I had one of those myself. It's called "This is the Day" by The The. Todd and I ended up engaged just weeks after I heard it for the first time, and it really did bring about some major life-changes and make things fall into place for me. Suddenly, things just "clicked".


This is the Day

Well you didn't wake up this morning
'Cause you didn't go to bed
You were watching the whites of your eyes turn red
The calendar on your wall is ticking the days off

You've been reading some old letters
You smile and think how much you've changed

All the money in the world couldn't buy back those days

You pull back the curtains
And the sun burns into your eyes
You watch a plane flying across a clear blue sky

This is the day your life will surely change
This is the day when things fall into place

You could've done anything
If you'd wanted

And all your friends and family
Think that you're lucky

But the side of you they'll never see
Is when you're left alone with the memories
That hold your life together like.....glue

You pull back the curtains
And the sun burns into your eyes
You watch a plane flying across a clear blue sky

This is the day your life will surely change
This is the day when things fall into place

This is the day your life will surely change.....

Song credit: The The


Do you have a similar song?
posted at 04:05 PM | link--it | mail it | (8) shout it



Gonna dress you up in my love
I didn't realize you could apply your CafePress store credits ("CafeCash") toward their merchandise until today -- so I finally got around to ordering one of my blog tees. This order came with a $5 off coupon on new $20 or more purchases from any of their stores, so the first person to e-mail me gets it. And please...only write if you plan on using it! It expires today -- May 29, 2003.

UPDATE: I met another...and poof!...it was gone!
posted at 03:42 PM | link--it | mail it | (5) shout it



Hate me - do it and do it again
Listening to this on Rome right now...why doesn't someone just rub the guy out once and for all? Seriously. It's no big loss. All he ever really gave us was an annoying Nintendo game.
posted at 12:30 PM | link--it | mail it | (11) shout it






It's picture page, it's picture page!
Well since my clients couldn't e-mail me today, I couldn't e-mail them, and I wasn't blogging...I actually used part of the afternoon to organize photos. Finally! So here are our last three day-trips in Shutterblog:

  1. Ybor City and Tampa, 05.10.03
  2. St. Petersburg, 05.18.03
  3. Memorial Day Weekend, 05.25.03
And...I'm spent!
posted at 09:57 PM | link--it | mail it | (4) shout it



Enjoy the silence?
Good thing I decided to take a break today, huh... The 'net done went and exploded on us. (More info about Wednesday's meltdown can be found here and here.)
posted at 08:06 PM | link--it | mail it | (11) shout it



This is a request, Mr. Radio Man
My blog is going to remain silent today as I take time to reflect on friendships and how precious life really is... While I'm taking the day off, I'll leave you with this:


Todd and I have started listening to our local "oldies" station's new format in the car. But I'm not talking shoo-do-wop, groups that start with the word "Four" for $200 Alex, kinda oldies. The following are just a sampling of what they are now calling "the greatest oldies of the 70s, 80s and early 90s" on this station:

  1. Girls on Film - Duran Duran
  2. Losing My Religion - R.E.M.
  3. Need You Tonight - INXS
  4. Enjoy the Silence - Depeche Mode
  5. We Got the Beat - The Go-Go's
  6. Der Komissar - After the Fire
  7. Goody Two Shoes - Adam Ant
  8. Pop Musik - M
Please note: it's no longer being called "retro". It's oldies. Although I think it's great we finally have a station we can stomach (that is, in between the Springsteen and Bon Jovi they also play here and there) -- I'm also quite distressed that while we seem to have one hand on the radio dial, the other is now on a bottle of Geritol. Did our parents go through this when the Beatles became oldies, too?
posted at 12:04 AM | link--it | mail it | (19) shout it






I talked for hours to your wallet photograph
The world has turned and left me here
Just where I was before you appeared
And in your place, an empty space
Has filled the void behind my face...


Well this has been a somewhat difficult day that I don't hope to repeat soon. I ordered the group floral arrangement for tomorrow's funeral. I think it's going to be nice -- eleven of our names are going on the card. I e-mailed the OU Scholars Program director with the news this afternoon. He was our academic adviser back when we all lived in the Honors Dorm. I wasn't sure if they wanted to offer official condolences to the family or not, but I thought it would be nice to give them the option. With only three small floors of residents above the offices, the Honors Dorm residents are a very tight-knit community. Our message board has had tributes and favorite memories passed back and forth today. I've talked with a few other friends today for the first time since this happened. And I put on a Nirvana CD -- something I haven't listened to in years -- and typed out a letter to Kevin. Adam is going to be a pallbearer, and said he would try to slip it in the casket for me since I can't be there tomorrow. The only other such letter I've ever written was to my Grandfather, but he had cancer and I was able to give it to him before he passed away. Knowing I've been trying to contact Kevin for three weeks and couldn't reach him has been particularly hard...this is the only goodbye I'll get, and it's after the fact. I noticed that Jana said her goodbyes at her blog as well.

Kevin's obituary came out in yesterday's paper. I'm going to edit it a bit out of respect for the family and their privacy. But since you've seen his photos, I thought you might want to see what an incredible, brilliant person he was as well.


KEVIN D. SMITH
The funeral for Kevin Daryl Smith, 28, will be 11 a.m. Wednesday, May 28, 2003.

He was born Sept. 29, 1974, to Fred D. and Lois L. Smith and died Thursday, May 22, 2003.

He graduated with honors from High School in 1992. In May 1997, he graduated summa cum laude from the University of Oklahoma and was admitted to the law school at the University of Texas at Austin. He earned his juris doctorate with honors in May 2000. He obtained a position with a law firm in Pittsburgh, Pa., recently transferring to its Dallas office.

He was preceded in death by his father, maternal grandfather and paternal grandparents.
posted at 06:06 PM | link--it | mail it | (5) shout it



She's got the cutest little baby face
Kevin just passed along this photo of my youngest fan -- his new niece who just happens to live right here in Tampa Bay. All together now...awwwww!
posted at 04:51 PM | link--it | mail it | (1) shout it



Give up the funk
There is absolutely nothing worse than having an installation guy out to your house in the summer -- and when they leave, the whole place reeking of "sweaty man ass". Excuse me. I have to go empty the contents of one of these now.
posted at 02:44 PM | link--it | mail it | (12) shout it






Temporary fix
Todd is out on a comfort food run to Chili's... Screw fat and calories. Waistline be damned. I want chicken fried steak and mashed taters with gravy. Now.

What's your favorite "break glass in case of emergency" comfort food?
posted at 07:25 PM | link--it | mail it | (42) shout it



America's Most Wanted
I was asked to pass this along, and I'm more than happy to do so. Especially given that one of his victims was from the Tampa Bay area... Please be on the lookout.
posted at 07:10 PM | link--it | mail it | (2) shout it



Get your motor runnin'
In an attempt to lighten things up around here just a bit, the dual-vanity plates we spied yesterday on our way to the beach... I wonder if they always have to stop at lights with him on the left and her on the right?


[hog and hogette]
posted at 01:54 PM | link--it | mail it | (8) shout it



The day after the night before
I don't think I got a full-hour's sleep straight last night. The tears finally came, and today my eyes have that puffy, tired "ache" to them. I just feel lost. And gripped by the fear that bad news always comes in threes, and this is just our second major loss of the year. The year's not even half-over yet.

We've debated and debated on whether or not to go back for the funeral, and I don't think we're going to. Money is extremely tight post-vacation to say the least. But that's not really the reason when it boils down to it. Knowing he was dating his ex-fiancée again really is honestly the reason for me. When I met him, I didn't know he was engaged to someone I knew. I just thought he was engaged to "someone" in Chicago. That someone turned out to be a good friend of mine from junior high and a fellow cheerleader. He broke off their engagement to start dating me, so there's obviously not a lot of good blood there -- even though it was a decision he made all on his own. Anyway, I just feel like "she" should be the one at the funeral since they had recently been back together again. Not me. I don't want to hurt her any more than she already is. And I'm just afraid seeing me would hurt her and open old wounds, in addition to the current ones she must have.

I'm not sure if that will make sense, but I don't suppose any of this makes sense to begin with, now does it? He's going to be buried in the same small town my grandfather is buried in, so hopefully one day soon I can pay them both a visit again...

Thanks so much to everyone who's e-mailed and left comments of support and encouragement. Please save your thoughts and prayers for his family, however. This is their second, difficult death in a couple of year's time. I just can't imagine what they must be going through.
posted at 12:59 PM | link--it | mail it | (0) shout it



Only words that I could find...
[Clearwater Beach 1] [Clearwater Beach 2] [Clearwater Beach 3]

A few photos from our late afternoon at the beach. You'll forgive me if my heart isn't exactly in them right now... I'll try to add more later this week.


We're getting older, the world's getting colder
For the life of me I don't know the reason why
Maybe it's livin' making us give in
Hearts rolling in taken back on the tide
We're balanced together ocean upon the sky...


UPDATE: All photos taken today can now be found in Shutterblog.
posted at 01:16 AM | link--it | mail it | (1) shout it






In the sun, in the sun I feel as one

[kevin smith]

It's a message you never expect on your voicemail after a day at the beach. "Hi, this is Kevin Smith's sister. Can you please give me a call as soon as you get this message?" Especially considering you haven't seen her since she was in grade school, and she's now a grown woman who barely even remembers you. The pit of your stomach sinks as you know it's not good. It can't be good. So you call a good friend close to home to see if they've heard anything. They haven't. And then you open your e-mail and immediately see the name of another good friend with the words, "Call me please." You know it's officially bad. Your fingers can't even tremble out the right numbers. It takes you three tries to dial. And it is bad. Then the phonecalls begin so you can pass along the news "in person", too...

A boyfriend of mine in college, and still someone I consider a very good friend, committed suicide this weekend. I believe he would have been 29 this fall. We talked as grown-apart couples and friends who are married (he, since divorced) do. Here and there. On occasion. E-mailing for several hours straight. Then not again for weeks. I honestly can't remember if I talked to Kevin this year. I can't remember a lot from this year to be honest. I know we talked at the end of last year. I know things were going well for him. He'd had a really tough time with his divorce and the death of his father, but he'd done very well for himself. He graduated near the top of his class at UT's law school and was working for a very prestigious firm in Pennsylvania. At the time, he had a new girlfriend and they had just moved in together. We talked a lot about football, and about how happy we were the Sooners were doing well. He had a new replica of Memorial Stadium he had with him at all times on game day. I had my lucky t-shirts.

Apparently he had just moved back to Texas within the last few weeks, and that's where it grows hazy for those of us close to him. He had started a new job with his firm, and was apparently seeing the girl he'd been engaged to before he dated me. We understand he'd been in touch with several people he'd been estranged with recently. I wasn't one of them.

But then again, we weren't estranged. I had seen him fairly recently. He was down here a few summers ago and we spent the afternoon together goofing off and catching up on old times. We had lunch with Todd. And then he was gone. I had no idea that would be the last time I'd see him. My name and number were on a note he left to his sister so I'd be notified. How do I come to terms with being on a list like that?

To be honest, I have no idea how this is effecting me yet. I've tried to cry, but the tears just stay there welled up like they can't fall. I'm in shock. Not in shock that this is actually something he did, because I dated him for a long time. I was friends with him even longer. I loved him. I knew him. We had fought about suicide when Kurt Cobain took his life. It was a wicked fight. (We had a lot of those, anyone who knew us well can attest to -- they were the basis of our relationship it seemed at times. But the bigger the fight, the deeper the friendship.) I knew how he felt about suicide. And I remember telling him at the time if he ever did that to me I would bring him back and kill him again for even trying it. But I just never dreamed...

Now I will spend the rest of my life wondering "what if". What if I'd fought a little harder with him in college to stay here with us. What if I had put my own pain aside this year and tried to find out that he had his own. What if my e-mails hadn't went unreturned the last three weeks. (Our dorm in college, where Todd also lived, has a new message board online and we're planning a reunion next year. I couldn't understand why he wasn't over there with us joining in on the fun. I was trying to get his attention and find out what he'd been up to.) What if. And why?

I miss him. And now I have to live with the fact I always will. All alone is all we are...



I know a lot of my friends from college read here from time to time. We're going to send a group arrangement from the Honors Dorm to the funeral home. The services are this coming Wednesday if you'd like more details. Please feel free to leave messages to his family in the comments and I'll make sure they're passed along, and if you'd like your name on the arrangement, just let me know. -Robyn
posted at 10:47 PM | link--it | mail it | (44) shout it



Good gravy!
I'm about to make this for a late breakfast before we start our glorious Florida bright sunshiney day. I needs me some chocolate. You have exactly 15 minutes to be here or be !
posted at 12:47 PM | link--it | mail it | (5) shout it



What's a girl gotta do?
Trash, princess, whore, and now twit (no link for your "15 minutes" this time, sorry).....but I won't feel I've really arrived 'til I get diva, dammit!
posted at 12:31 PM | link--it | mail it | (10) shout it



Sans taste
Remember this entry of mine earlier in the week? Who knew? (Thanks to Kristine for the link!)
posted at 12:32 AM | link--it | mail it | (3) shout it